Status Quo
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Status Quo
Staying home alone on a Friday
Flat on the floor looking back
On old love
Or lack thereof
We were at the dinner table when the incident about the letter was mentioned. There was a television talk show on from the living room, and we could hear the conversation between the host and the guests from where we were. They were on the topic of relationships, and my mother started to talk about her own relationship with my father. I've already heard the stories a couple of times, but my sister was obviously new to the whole "Father-made-a-fool-out-of-himself" bit on the train. So my mother went to great length to explain to her what exactly happened on that fateful day almost thirty years ago. Then of course, the inevitable mentioning of the letter came along.
When we moved to Singapore, my mother - being the lover of books as she is - brought along with her books that she kept ever since her teenage years. And they are all kept on the shelves around the house, slowing turning yellow and succumbing to the sands of time. Sometime last week, my mother was flipping through one of the old books when a letter slipped out from between the pages. It was a love letter that my father gave to her when they were still dating, and she found the contents of the letter to be utterly amusing. Showing it to my father who was then in Singapore, he squirmed and groaned in disgust. Not at the fact that my mother was excited to find such a letter, but rather at how disgusting he could get with his contents and words. However, one thing was undisputed: He had way better handwriting in his younger days. Whatever happened to Mr. Lova-Lover, I wonder.
After all the crushes have faded
And all my wishful thinking was wrong
I'm jaded
I hate it
My sister then fell into an uncomfortable silence, studying her bowl of rice with strange and extraordinary attention. It was perhaps of the fact that her birthday is in two months or so, which means that she'll be turning twenty-four soon. By that age, my mother was already dating the father, cruising down highways in my father's military jeep that he secretly drove out from camp, feeling the love that one would get from the man of her life. But at the brink of turning 24, my sister is still very much single - never receiving any love letter whatsoever. That fact is quite shocking to the people who doesn't know my sister at all, because judging from her looks, you'd think that she has hordes of men swarming behind her shadow at any one time.
That is not the case though, as my sister confines herself at home most of the time, leaving her room only to eat or to watch the television. Even her friends' invitations to go out shopping can be rejected by her, claiming that she already has plans when all she wants to do is to sleep in for the rest of the day. That's my sister for you, at 24 and never been kissed. There isn't anything wrong with that, but I'm sure my parents worry at times if she is ever going to find a perfect partner, a partner that is not going to be part of a boy band, or one that spends his time with her predominantly through a computer screen or a two-dimensional poster on the walls.
I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
Get here...
My sister has had a million boyfriends. From Nick Carter of Backstreet Boys, to Jimmy Lin from the old Taiwanese musical scene, and the Japanese boys bouncing around on stage like monkeys. Her taste for music never changed since young, and has been idolizing them for ages. Though she never claimed any one of them to be her boyfriend - she never claimed herself to be Mrs. (Fill in the blank) - the amount of devotion and commitment she has for them is rather astounding. The way she'd wait at the airport to welcome her favorite bands to the country, and the way she'd send them off with a thousand other 'wives', you start to wonder if she is ever going to have time to get a true boyfriend.
You might say that as a brother, of course I am oblivious to her relational history. After all, the group of people that you are probably going to keep your boyfriend from at the earlier parts of a relationship is probably the family sector. You are going to lie to your family members about where you are going, who you are going out with, and what you are doing just to have them stop asking you questions. So naturally, a brother - like myself - wouldn't have a clue as to whether she's had a partner before or not.
Searching all my days just to find you
Not sure who I'm looking for
I'll know when
When I see you
However, according to my deductions and analysis, I must be right. That's because her phone bills never exceeded her monthly fees, which is sign number one for being single. You don't get into a relationship without your phone bills flying off the charts, at least that is my experience in the beginning. Also, she confines herself to her bedroom and the front of her computer all day long, chatting with her friends and playing Sims 2. She holds the record in the family of not leaving the house for a whole two weeks, and was dragged out of it only because my father came back from Taiwan and we were supposed to have dinner out at a restaurant.
At home, she spends the majority of her time - like I said - before the computer. If she isn't with that pink colored laptop of hers, she spends the time in bed sleeping or eating supper. It is not an uncommon sight for you to see her squatting in front of the television with a whole pot of leftover food, munching away like a crazed old woman. I know I shattered a lot of beauty images the readers have crafted of my sister over the years. After all, with a Friendster display picture like hers, it is hard to believe that the same person can remain single for twenty-four years, and capable of the above mentioned acts. But I spoke the truth, and nothing but the truth. I live with my sister - I know.
Until then I'll hide in my bedroom
Staying up all night just to write
A love song
For no one
My mother and I talked about this a long time ago, while I was in her room talking about my own relationship and she was telling me of her own. At that time, I was still happily attached and was oblivious of the hell that ensued. However, I was hopeful at that time about everything, and was downright sure of my decision. Anyway, the topic turned to my sister's own love life, and I asked my mother if she ever worried about the sister not getting a suitable boyfriend, after being single for so many years.
Though she denied that she was ever worried about that, I'm sure every parent is going to start worrying about it when your daughter turns a certain age and remains a amateur in the field of relationships. After all, a female friend of mine once told me that women have an expiry date much earlier than men's, and it is going to be very hard for you to get into a relationship, get married, set up a family. The term 'Expiry Date' is a rather morbid term, but that's what she used on herself and I'm sure you know what it means. It has a euphemism, but it escaped my mind.
I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
My mother told me about my father's sister, my aunt, who got married only in her late thirties. She didn't go into details about anything, but told me how fate can play a part in one's relationships, and that it all depends on fate to make 'it' happen. I personally have little belief in this little thing called 'fate', or 'destiny'. I believe that you do whatever you can until destiny reveals itself to you. I'd hate to think that my life is being planned out for me already, and I am merely a puppet going through the motions of life. To be dictated by a force much bigger than ourselves is quite a disturbing thought really, and to hate it disguised under such a word as 'fate' is almost preposterous.
Anyway, my mother believes that everything has its time, and the time will come when my sister is going to find the right person. However, she does agree with me that he is going to be a guy who needs a lot of tolerance, a very good temper and a big stomach to stomach someone like my sister. Because she is not the kind of person who is going to tell you that "I am happy" or "I am sad" or "I am angry". She is going to show you that she is feeling those ways, and no one can tolerate non-verbal communications such as the ones mentioned above for too long - save for the Mr. Verytolerant I mentioned earlier.
I could have met you in the sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?
For the past twenty-four years, my sister has restricted herself to mere crushes even in schools. She seldom talks about them, but when she does she talks little. There was a guy in her Junior College back in her school days whom she had a major crush on. While I was giving seashells and writing cards to confess my liking to a person that I liked at her age, she was taking pictures of him from the top of a stairwell, secretly and almost like a criminal of some kind, guilty of voyeurism. She posted the picture on her MSN display picture once, and all I saw was a blurry picture of a guy's head and nothing else. But she had a kick out of ogling over that picture, so nobody complained about it anyway.
I remember one fine afternoon when I tried to convince her to tell that particular person her feelings. But she was hesitate and shy, thinking that nothing is going to work out between her and anybody else. After all, this is the woman who was harassed on the streets by schoolboys asking for her phone number, and plagued with male friends whom she deems to be 'stupid', 'lame', 'idiotic' or just pure 'irritating'. Even in the arts institution, nobody ever amazed her enough to make a move, or to have any feelings bounce around inside her heart. It is either because you can never pull a stubborn horse to the river to drink, or that men really are becoming dumber and less attractive these days.
I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
As a brother, I only wish for her happiness. However, I'd hate to see her in my state of mind if her very first relationship doesn't work out. After all, how many first relationships can be come the last relationship as well. This is not a genetic thing, and it's not like this is going to happen to her just because the same happened to both my parents. I'd hate to see my sister crying her eyes out like I did, sinking into depression like I did, and basically just building a wall around me - like I did. I still prefer this bubbly, insane, crazy, lame sister of mine - even if she remains in her status quo at Zilch, Non, Nix, Zip, Diddly, Bupkis, Niente, Zero, Nothing.
You'll be so good
You'll be so good for me
You'll be so good
You'll be so good for me
Staying home alone on a Friday
Flat on the floor looking back
On old love
Or lack thereof
We were at the dinner table when the incident about the letter was mentioned. There was a television talk show on from the living room, and we could hear the conversation between the host and the guests from where we were. They were on the topic of relationships, and my mother started to talk about her own relationship with my father. I've already heard the stories a couple of times, but my sister was obviously new to the whole "Father-made-a-fool-out-of-himself" bit on the train. So my mother went to great length to explain to her what exactly happened on that fateful day almost thirty years ago. Then of course, the inevitable mentioning of the letter came along.
When we moved to Singapore, my mother - being the lover of books as she is - brought along with her books that she kept ever since her teenage years. And they are all kept on the shelves around the house, slowing turning yellow and succumbing to the sands of time. Sometime last week, my mother was flipping through one of the old books when a letter slipped out from between the pages. It was a love letter that my father gave to her when they were still dating, and she found the contents of the letter to be utterly amusing. Showing it to my father who was then in Singapore, he squirmed and groaned in disgust. Not at the fact that my mother was excited to find such a letter, but rather at how disgusting he could get with his contents and words. However, one thing was undisputed: He had way better handwriting in his younger days. Whatever happened to Mr. Lova-Lover, I wonder.
After all the crushes have faded
And all my wishful thinking was wrong
I'm jaded
I hate it
My sister then fell into an uncomfortable silence, studying her bowl of rice with strange and extraordinary attention. It was perhaps of the fact that her birthday is in two months or so, which means that she'll be turning twenty-four soon. By that age, my mother was already dating the father, cruising down highways in my father's military jeep that he secretly drove out from camp, feeling the love that one would get from the man of her life. But at the brink of turning 24, my sister is still very much single - never receiving any love letter whatsoever. That fact is quite shocking to the people who doesn't know my sister at all, because judging from her looks, you'd think that she has hordes of men swarming behind her shadow at any one time.
That is not the case though, as my sister confines herself at home most of the time, leaving her room only to eat or to watch the television. Even her friends' invitations to go out shopping can be rejected by her, claiming that she already has plans when all she wants to do is to sleep in for the rest of the day. That's my sister for you, at 24 and never been kissed. There isn't anything wrong with that, but I'm sure my parents worry at times if she is ever going to find a perfect partner, a partner that is not going to be part of a boy band, or one that spends his time with her predominantly through a computer screen or a two-dimensional poster on the walls.
I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
Get here...
My sister has had a million boyfriends. From Nick Carter of Backstreet Boys, to Jimmy Lin from the old Taiwanese musical scene, and the Japanese boys bouncing around on stage like monkeys. Her taste for music never changed since young, and has been idolizing them for ages. Though she never claimed any one of them to be her boyfriend - she never claimed herself to be Mrs. (Fill in the blank) - the amount of devotion and commitment she has for them is rather astounding. The way she'd wait at the airport to welcome her favorite bands to the country, and the way she'd send them off with a thousand other 'wives', you start to wonder if she is ever going to have time to get a true boyfriend.
You might say that as a brother, of course I am oblivious to her relational history. After all, the group of people that you are probably going to keep your boyfriend from at the earlier parts of a relationship is probably the family sector. You are going to lie to your family members about where you are going, who you are going out with, and what you are doing just to have them stop asking you questions. So naturally, a brother - like myself - wouldn't have a clue as to whether she's had a partner before or not.
Searching all my days just to find you
Not sure who I'm looking for
I'll know when
When I see you
However, according to my deductions and analysis, I must be right. That's because her phone bills never exceeded her monthly fees, which is sign number one for being single. You don't get into a relationship without your phone bills flying off the charts, at least that is my experience in the beginning. Also, she confines herself to her bedroom and the front of her computer all day long, chatting with her friends and playing Sims 2. She holds the record in the family of not leaving the house for a whole two weeks, and was dragged out of it only because my father came back from Taiwan and we were supposed to have dinner out at a restaurant.
At home, she spends the majority of her time - like I said - before the computer. If she isn't with that pink colored laptop of hers, she spends the time in bed sleeping or eating supper. It is not an uncommon sight for you to see her squatting in front of the television with a whole pot of leftover food, munching away like a crazed old woman. I know I shattered a lot of beauty images the readers have crafted of my sister over the years. After all, with a Friendster display picture like hers, it is hard to believe that the same person can remain single for twenty-four years, and capable of the above mentioned acts. But I spoke the truth, and nothing but the truth. I live with my sister - I know.
Until then I'll hide in my bedroom
Staying up all night just to write
A love song
For no one
My mother and I talked about this a long time ago, while I was in her room talking about my own relationship and she was telling me of her own. At that time, I was still happily attached and was oblivious of the hell that ensued. However, I was hopeful at that time about everything, and was downright sure of my decision. Anyway, the topic turned to my sister's own love life, and I asked my mother if she ever worried about the sister not getting a suitable boyfriend, after being single for so many years.
Though she denied that she was ever worried about that, I'm sure every parent is going to start worrying about it when your daughter turns a certain age and remains a amateur in the field of relationships. After all, a female friend of mine once told me that women have an expiry date much earlier than men's, and it is going to be very hard for you to get into a relationship, get married, set up a family. The term 'Expiry Date' is a rather morbid term, but that's what she used on herself and I'm sure you know what it means. It has a euphemism, but it escaped my mind.
I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
My mother told me about my father's sister, my aunt, who got married only in her late thirties. She didn't go into details about anything, but told me how fate can play a part in one's relationships, and that it all depends on fate to make 'it' happen. I personally have little belief in this little thing called 'fate', or 'destiny'. I believe that you do whatever you can until destiny reveals itself to you. I'd hate to think that my life is being planned out for me already, and I am merely a puppet going through the motions of life. To be dictated by a force much bigger than ourselves is quite a disturbing thought really, and to hate it disguised under such a word as 'fate' is almost preposterous.
Anyway, my mother believes that everything has its time, and the time will come when my sister is going to find the right person. However, she does agree with me that he is going to be a guy who needs a lot of tolerance, a very good temper and a big stomach to stomach someone like my sister. Because she is not the kind of person who is going to tell you that "I am happy" or "I am sad" or "I am angry". She is going to show you that she is feeling those ways, and no one can tolerate non-verbal communications such as the ones mentioned above for too long - save for the Mr. Verytolerant I mentioned earlier.
I could have met you in the sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?
For the past twenty-four years, my sister has restricted herself to mere crushes even in schools. She seldom talks about them, but when she does she talks little. There was a guy in her Junior College back in her school days whom she had a major crush on. While I was giving seashells and writing cards to confess my liking to a person that I liked at her age, she was taking pictures of him from the top of a stairwell, secretly and almost like a criminal of some kind, guilty of voyeurism. She posted the picture on her MSN display picture once, and all I saw was a blurry picture of a guy's head and nothing else. But she had a kick out of ogling over that picture, so nobody complained about it anyway.
I remember one fine afternoon when I tried to convince her to tell that particular person her feelings. But she was hesitate and shy, thinking that nothing is going to work out between her and anybody else. After all, this is the woman who was harassed on the streets by schoolboys asking for her phone number, and plagued with male friends whom she deems to be 'stupid', 'lame', 'idiotic' or just pure 'irritating'. Even in the arts institution, nobody ever amazed her enough to make a move, or to have any feelings bounce around inside her heart. It is either because you can never pull a stubborn horse to the river to drink, or that men really are becoming dumber and less attractive these days.
I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
As a brother, I only wish for her happiness. However, I'd hate to see her in my state of mind if her very first relationship doesn't work out. After all, how many first relationships can be come the last relationship as well. This is not a genetic thing, and it's not like this is going to happen to her just because the same happened to both my parents. I'd hate to see my sister crying her eyes out like I did, sinking into depression like I did, and basically just building a wall around me - like I did. I still prefer this bubbly, insane, crazy, lame sister of mine - even if she remains in her status quo at Zilch, Non, Nix, Zip, Diddly, Bupkis, Niente, Zero, Nothing.
You'll be so good
You'll be so good for me
You'll be so good
You'll be so good for me
This entry was posted
on Wednesday, June 06, 2007 at 10:30 PM.
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