In Continuum.

Ignition

It is not nice to be caught in the middle of things, especially when we are dealing with an argument between a couple. There is something about your name being mentioned in one of those silly arguments that is terribly disconcerting, and that is exactly how I felt when my name was mentioned during one of their silly arguments. That is usually the kind of arguments you get anyway, the kind that sparks off in between a couple in love. To make things worse, my name was brought up our of no reason at all, or perhaps it was brought up out of months of accumulated jealousy. After all, jealousy overwrites the rational side of a man's brain and causes him to go haywire. And it's not like such jealousy can be controlled at all, because even the slightest touch or the softest words spoken could trigger off a violent reaction. At least that seems to be the crime that I have committed: By being the friend of a certain man's partner.

Perhaps he should start to realize that there is such a thing as "Platonic relationship". It is not a pot at the end of the rainbow, there is such a thing in existence. I don't suppose men are built to fall for every women in sight, or any woman that is closer to him in his social circle. It'd be quite a chaos if that is the truth, and I'm sure the Big Man had it all planned out when the world started a few billion years ago. Anyway, somewhere down the line of human history, somebody observed the kind of innocent relationship in between a male and a female, and called it 'Platonic', and that is certainly not a myth. I personally have a dozen such relationships with other people, and have no intentions on 'making my move', whatsoever. Let's allow logic to speak for a moment here. If I do have some sort of hidden agendas; if I do have some intentions towards your partner, why wait until she is attached? I have known her for almost five years before you came along, so why wait all those times? Think about it, really.

There are people out there, using the cloak of 'platonic relationship' as a way to creep closer. I know, because I was a victim of such an act as well. There was this guy in my own relationship, who came in and out of my own relationship with the ex in the past, going out with her and visiting our favorite restaurants, all under my nose. It didn't feel really good, but at the same time I didn't want to confined my partner to me. I was perhaps too liberal with her, so much so that she ended up in somebody else's bed. However, I still think that I did the right thing by not doing anything at all. It's one of those things that works both ways I suppose. You shouldn't expect others to do what you wouldn't want others to do to you. Besides, it's not like she never made it clear to you about my existence, so to say something like that without my presence just seems incredibly childish and unfair altogether.

It felt like one of those scenes you see in movies, when two adults would argue over the smallest of issues, and somehow the kid would become involved in the whole hoo-hah. It doesn't matter if the kid is innocent in the matter, because the child is always at fault one way or another. At least that is the mentality of our parents, once they become too involved in their own warped reasoning. It is almost impossible to have them think otherwise, because a lot of issues between married couples do have their roots in the children, and I feel like that kid right in the middle of the both of you, sitting there with my toy truck and looking upwards as the both of you battle things out verbally in the middle of Orchard Road.

Like she said, it is incredibly unfair to have my name mentioned in the first place. After all, I think anybody who knows her long enough would understand her as well as me, and it has nothing to do with me being closer to her than anybody else. You came into her life much later than I did, so naturally it'd take a little bit longer for you to get involved. There is a ritual involved in introducing you to our social circle, and that may take some time especially for somebody like you. But be patient, because that is usually what it takes for you to be in the circle of trust. I have liked you when I first met you at the birthday party, and the subsequent supper at the hawker center. However, if I had known that you harbored that jealousy for me, I would've changed my perception of you the way you have changed yours of me. The truth is, I think you are a really nice person, and is obviously treating my best friend the way you should be treating her - though, maybe a little bit over the top. You are doing a relatively good job as compared to the other relationships that I am witnessing, so perhaps you should stop mentioning my name in one of your petty arguments, how's that?

Instead of impressing your partner, the more important person to impress would be your partner's best friends. That is a very important point in the Relationship 101 book that I should be getting you, and whatever you are doing is probably against everything the book preaches - if the book exists at all. I don't suppose it is very wise and fair of you to have used my name as your weapon of choice, and especially so when I wasn't there to defend myself. I know that the words "We are just friends" stinks more than the fart of a skunk. But that is the truth between the both of us, and there is absolutely nothing going on. After all, I meet your girlfriend once every month or less, and you get to meet her everyday of the week. So I really don't see why I should be the subject of your jealousy at all.

But then again, I don't suppose jealousy needs a justified root at all. Jealousy could stem from the slightest and the most trivial of subjects. Perhaps the fact that I understand her music taste better than you is something that you are unhappy about? Well, it's not like I started out knowing everything about her either. The first time I took notice of her was during a lecture in Junior College, when she left for the restroom with a bunch of friends, and I noticed the key chain that dangled from her bag that spelled her name. We all start somewhere, and you started a few years later than me. In a relationship of any kind, it is always about observing the other party, knowing the little details and then working on them at the same time. If she tells you that she doesn't like Blonde Redhead, don't send her any Blonde Redhead. If she liked Suzanne Vega, send her the whole album. That is how you work it, really. That is how I did it, anyway.

And no, I do not know more about music than you do, so the next time you decide to use that as an excuse to bring up my name, forget it. I personally think that there is no such thing as being more knowledgeable in music whatsoever. OK, I know the guitar and a little bit of violin, and I have been playing random tunes on the piano whenever I get my hands on one. In terms of theory, yes perhaps I do know a thing or two more than you - but that is also because I take it as a subject in school. But when it comes to knowing what music they are playing in the mall, it is an open game to everybody I suppose. Anybody on the streets could have known the name of the song that she was asking you about, and the fact that you didn't know it doesn't automatically equate to me knowing it at all. Seriously, that was completely uncalled for.

So, the next time you decide to use me as your ignition key, don't. It doesn't make anybody better or worse off, does it? I don't suppose you'd want to see me from this moment on, and I share the same sentiments as well. Don't get me wrong, I still like you as a guy. I'm more concerned about how you would look at me, if we do meet in the days to come. Like I told her, neither am I going to encourage or avoid it from happening. Just treat my friend better, and stop using me as an excuse. If you want to, use her exes, use L. - if you know who L. is - if you want to. Imagine me using your friends as my weapon of choice, it's not going to be pretty.