In Continuum.

Yes, superheroes, that is what I am going to blog about. I don't think it'd be accurate to call myself a fan of the superheroes. After all, the better part of all the superheroes ever known to mankind exists under DC Comics and Marvel, which I've seldom been a fan of. My heart usually lies with Vertigo, for some reason, though there are obvious exceptions most of the time. I am, by no means, an expert to consult when it comes to the superhero genre, and that title strictly belongs to my good friend, MJ. Yet, I still consider myself a fan of comic books, or graphic novels are they'd usually like to be known as, if they have the mouth and the mind to correct you. Graphic novels these days don't necessarily need to revolve around superheroes any longer, though that is not to say that they are obsolete. The graphic novels these days could involve anything from how the last male on Earth survives in a world dominated by women (Y The Last Man), a masked vigilante bent to spread anarchy (V for Vendetta), to traditional fairy tale characters fleeing from their homelands in the storybooks into New York, away from their common enemies (Fables). Superheroes, on the other hand, are still very relevant today, which is why it is a comic book genre that isn't going to die out anytime soon. 

You can call me a geek at times, the way I tend to go on and on about comic book characters from time to time. I mean, I just get so involved in the story that I can lose track of time, most of the time. Hell, I even have the Comedian's badge pinned onto my bag, so I guess that says a lot about how deeply poisoned I am, albeit so sweetly. I am the kind of person who'd ponder over who is the most powerful comic book character ever created, in terms of their superpowers. It may turn off a few readers out there, but just give it a shot when you are stuck on a long bus ride with your iPod low on battery. Your mind wanders to places, and I am proud of the places that it goes to at times. I have concluded that Dr. Manhattan and Herbie Popnecker are the two most powerful comic book characters ever created, and no possible characters could beat them in an arena fight. Dr. Manhattan has the ability to teleport, to tell the future, and the ability to manipulate objects on an atomic level. His atoms were ripped apart, and he was still able to piece himself back together in no time. Herbie Popnecker has the ability to defeat his enemies with his dead stare, and a giant lollipop. Go figure. 

Amongst all the superheroes, the more prominent ones anyway, I've never gotten into many of them, truth to be told. I mean, I really dislike it when a character is purposefully made to be a superhero, and he almost never gets defeated. Superman is guilty of that, and his only weakness is just really damn lame. Throw little pebbles at him from his home planet and he is going to whimper like a girl because it sucks his powers away. Besides, Batman kicked his butt in The Dark Knight Returns, so that's got to count for something when an alien gets his butt handed to him by a mortal in a fistfight. The whole thing about flying around Earth at light speed just to turn back the hands of time is just cheesy as hell, and it is ridiculous even in the comic medium. I've never had much love for Hulk as well, because he just feels like a giant broccoli to me. He doesn't seem very smart for the most part, and he's just angry all the time. I mean, the whole physics behind his pants just doesn't make any sense at all - they never rip! Those are some really elastic jeans I must say, or does the ultimate Hulk really have a small willy? Only the X-rated version of the Incredible Hulk will reveal the truth, and maybe She-Hulk will know too. What's up with She-Hulk anyway? She's almost as stupid as her male counterpart, and looks a lot like the Jolly Green Giant. 

You know, when you have read comic books for a long enough time, you kinda wish that the superpowers will rub off on you just a little bit. You know, the power of flight, teleportation, mind control, stuff like that. That'd be great skills to have, but that just doesn't happen all that often. The closest feat that I've ever come to achieving superhero powers was when I went on without food for couple of days in the army. That was probably the closest I've ever come, but I'd like to have more powers - why not, right? For starters, I'd really like to have the ability to read lips. I know, it's not exactly a superpower, but I think it is a power nonetheless. Just imagine the possibilities of transcending physical space by reading the lips of people from all the way across the other side of the road, or something. Also, I'd like to have the ability to know what someone is listening to on his or her iPod. Like, I'd be able to tune in to whatever that he or she is listening to if I want to, because I am just curious that way. I mean, teleportation would be great, but I don't want the responsibilities that'd come along with it. After all, what if I teleport myself into a concrete wall or something like that. I am not claustrophobic for the most part, but that sounds positively frightening. 

I have created a few superheroes from time to time, but none as compelling as the ones that I have created, for fun, with the significant other. Allow me to share some of them with you in brief, in regards to their abilities. There's Vista Man and Mac Man, like the computers, only in computerized forms. Vista Man has the ability to pair up with any other conventional superheroes and battle evils, because of his ability to gather "drivers", a mystical element in his blood that allows him to share a bond with other superheroes. Like, the Scanner Man or the Printer Man, and all the other IT equipment men that could be of aid to Vista man. However, Mac Man has all the abilities of a Mac-based computer, translated into a human body. He does everything that a Vista Man can do, but he does it with more style and finess. Mac Man does not contract viruses that keep him out of battle, and upgrades himself from one form to another frequently in relative to his counterpart, Vista Man. Vista Man's upgrades come slow, and there are times when they are deeply flawed. That is also why Vista Man has been the target of many criticisms, and the butt of many jokes around the internet. Vista Man has been sinking slowly into oblivion ever since, making way for new computer-based superheroes. 

Yet, despite all their powers, they stand in awe in the presence of this one man, the superhero to rule them all. Introducing: The De-reason Man. The De-reason Man is exactly how his name sounds like, and he defies reason. There is no known way to destroy De-reason Man, simply because. De-reason Man does not have to explain himself to anybody, not even Chuck Norris. De-Reason Man creates his own reasons, no matter how ridiculous, and he makes it a fact. You cannot kill De-reason Man even if you throw an asteroid at him, because. You cannot kill De-reason Man by splitting his atoms apart, because. De-reason Man can destroy you with a single touch of his fingers, because. De-reason Man is immortal, because. He doesn't need reasons to act - he just acts. He is not bound by physical laws of the world, because he trespasses all of them in his own twisted reasons. Nothing can destroy De-reason Man, because. That is the only explanation he would give you, even if it really isn't an explanation at all. You'd perish without knowing why, because. That is the power of De-reason Man, the power to be unreasonable and thus, doing anything he wants. He is the most powerful entity in the entire universe! Fear him - because.