In Continuum.

I remember myself first starting out as a new student in my current college, fresh out of doing absolutely nothing, ready to do absolutely everything. That was me at the beginning of my college school days, when everything was shrouded in questions and I didn't really understand everything. School was enjoyable at that point in time, though that is not to say that it isn't now. I suppose everybody enjoys the first semester, and that was the time when social politics never really existed, and everybody liked each other - whatever happened to that? I suppose things change all the time, or that people change all the time. First semester was great because the people were new, the school was new, the subjects were new. One of the first modules that I took on was COM101, the very basic of the degree that I am taking right now. One of the classes delved briefly into interpersonal communication, an aspect in which I went in-depth a few semesters later. At any rate, I remember a particular name of a scholar particularly well for some reason, and his name is Knapp. Knapp, because he has an interesting last name, and I remember asking a friend of if the K or the N should be silenced (It's the N by the way). 

Anyway, Knapp's Model divided human relationships, especially that of a romantic relationship, into a bunch of stages. I don't remember every single stage of the relationship now, but I know one of them is called "Integration", where the partners become integrated into each others' lives in terms of the social circles as well as the families. Knapp's Model has come under a lot of criticisms over the years, particularly because his model also includes the decline in a relationship, which eventually leads to the last stage called "Termination". Yet, as we all know, not all relationships end up in that stage, and not everybody would end up terminating their relations. It might stagnant, like one of the stage describes, but not necessarily termination. Still, the rest of that model still seems pretty relevant, and "Integration" is the stage that seems particularly so right now. The reason being is that I was talked into meeting the family of the significant other. Not just the parents, but the family - everybody else. It was a thought that she had the night before, about how it'd be nice for me to meet her family and stuff. I suppose she wanted to get it over and done with, and I guess in a way I wanted that too. So after much persuasion, I convinced even myself that it'd be a good idea. 

I've never done this sort of thing before, meeting more than the parents. It was, to be quite honest, terrifying at first. It was a thought as we raced through the corridors of the airport, a thought that lingered in my head through lunch, and a thought even as I fell slowly asleep in her bed with her soft toy beneath my head. It's just that I haven't considered myself to be very good with parents or relatives. Having been away from Taiwan for the most part of my life, relationships with relatives have been limited to just casual gatherings and dinners. There are pros and cons about that I guess, and I've grown to get used to such things over the years. Meeting the parents is one thing I suppose, but meeting relatives just seems to be a whole new hill to climb somehow. It seems a lot higher, considering the sheer number of people I'd have to meet at one time. It's like, you could probably take on one or two eighty year old man with daggers, trying to stab you. But when they are coming in trucks, you are going to have a major problem at hand. I'm not saying that her relatives are old, or that they were all out to kill me or anything. But it's just that collectively, no matter how harmless, people can be a dangerous thing. 

It was a little over six in the afternoon when I woke up in her bed with her next to me. I was just so tired throughout the afternoon for some reason that I just crashed when I got to her place. Besides, the air conditioning was awesome, the rain was coming down right outside the window, her bed has sedation drugs sprinkled all over (no, not really), and the room was dark as night. Anyway, by the time I woke up, it was about time to leave for her grandmother's place anyway, so I crawled out of her bed and got ready. In my head, I was just trying to not think about the meeting, which only served to make me think even harder about it. But I guess, whatever that I had in mind, it probably wasn't going to be as bad as how it'd turn out - and it didn't. It was raining while we were at the back of her father's car, speeding down the highway into a familiar neighborhood. We pulled into the parking lot of a rather old looking HDB estate, and made our way across the road and into a lift lobby. By that time, I had the mental picture in mind of how it usually is like during my own family gathering. You know, adults sitting around and talking while everybody else would be staring into deep space. The children would be screaming, taking forever to eat anything, and some of them would end up crying. 

We arrived at grandma's house with just her and the maid. She was cooking in the kitchen while the maid helped out. It was good for me, because that'd mean that the relatives would only come one by one, and I'd only need to greet them one at a time - awesome. And that was the sequence of events, with them coming in one by one, and me telling them my name and stuff like that. I was referred to as "the friend" for the most part, though I suppose the adults weren't so stupid that they took it on face value. Jokes were made about my name, and that was the end for the most part. They left me alone with the significant other, and was probably glad to have me entertain their children for the rest of the evening. The children were Chloe, Roy, Nicholas and Melvin. They were all pretty young, with Nicholas being the oldest, and all those young cousins of the significant other took more interest in my iPod Touch and Macbook more than I ever did when I first got it. The children took over my iPod Touch to play Rolando, and then later my Macbook to take pictures on Photobooth. I know the fascination with your faces being altered in Photobooth, but those children too excitement to a whole new level. I haven't seen anybody so excited with their faces being twisted into a swirl before, but they were. They started fighting over my Macbook, and I finally found a bunch of people more of an addict than I am. 

Then one of her aunts came over and asked if she could use my Macbook to play a CD she burned. Of course I had to say yes even when the batteries were running low, because you really want to have a good impression with, not just the parents, but the relatives as well. So I had to play nice, answer every question thrown at me, laugh at everything that they said about my name. Somebody said that I share the same name as Will Smith and was fascinated by that, though it really is just a name I came up with at the counter of a random Coffee Bean a long time ago. And as for the Macbook, thankfully it worked with the CD and everything went on well. It was a video about Roy's recent birthday party at McDonald's or something like that, and it was just nice to have everybody gathered around my Macbook to see it. I felt like I contributed somehow, more than the fact that I managed to fix a toy together for the kids from a Kinder Surprise. By the way, whatever happened to those eggs? Now they are ugly plastic eggs with two lumps of chocolates inside that look more like a collection of lizard shit. Whatever happened to the brown eggs with white chocolate lined inside, and the awesome foil that wrapped around it! Oh, my childhood, completely ruined by companies that feel that changing the packaging is the best way to innovate. IT ISN'T.

The children saved my life, it really did. If not for them, I'd have such a hard time fitting into the family. Or rather, integrating. I know it was done to get it out of the way, to get things over and done with so to speak. But I thought that I might as well try to enjoy it, and I did enjoy the company of the children. Though, there were times when I really wanted to kick Melvin for being impolite to me when he wanted to use the Macbook, they were still kids after all, and I was more than happy to be the cool new member of the family, so to speak. I can imagine how it'd be like without the children now, just the significant other and I, and the rest of the adults. There were rules inside grandma's house apparently, she wasn't allowed to put her arms around me. I suppose she is just a very traditional old lady, and such physical contacts were supposedly too close for comfort. But the other adults had no problems with that, and certainly not Chloe when she asked her if we kissed and are going to have babies. At any rate, I thought Operation Brownie was a roaring success. I call it Operation Brownie, because I was there to earn brownie points initially, but ended up hanging out with the kids and having a great time. 

I am glad that we did it, though I think it was a little too soon. Got it over and done with, I guess that is the best way to describe it. Yet, for some reason, I do look forward to future opportunities with them, I guess it's just fun to be the big brother of sorts. Again, the children saved my life, but it really was Neptina that saved the day. The way she held my hand throughout the video screening on my Macbook, and the way she tried to make the meeting with the relatives as bearable as possible. She introduced them to me and I to them, and saved me the trouble to make an elaborate introduction. I suppose she walked me through everything, and I am just thankful that she was there every step of the way. Anyway, so integration is completed, and I do hope that Knapp was wrong about everything else that follows suit. You cannot predict the pattern of every relationship by calling your claim a "model". Yet, I suppose, knowing what could happen in the future allows you to prevent it from happening, you know? I suppose it shall be my turn to integrate her into my life soon, and I guess it is only fair. So, watch out Neptina. Just you wait.