Here and Now
Saturday, January 28, 2006
Here and Now
A friend of mine,we've been talking lately about her relationship.It's funny,the way she sees it.The way she keeps telling me that the relationship is not going to last,that this boyfriend will not be her last,that they will never get married,stuff like that.Stuff,that an ordinary "In-a-relationship" person wouldnt normally say.I mean,you are in it now,right?So why think about the end of this journey when you only just started?She said she's being realistic,and that being so she wouldnt have any expectations,then in turn not have any disappointments,always happy.True,but i guess there is a thin line between being realistic and being disgustingly pessimistic,and here's the example,perfect one at that.
Having a relationship is not a trip around the globe,i think.You dont start on a journey thinking about the end of the line,especially when your sails are high and the wind is soothing,smooth sailing through the Pacific.It doesnt work that way,i guess.
Here's a part of A.S. Byatt's book,Possession that i found relevant to her situation.So here it is,enjoy.
"What is it? My dear?"
"Ah, how can we bear it?"
"Bear what?"
"This. For so short a time. How can we sleep this time away?"
"We can be quiet together, and pretend --- since it is only the beginning --- that we have all the time in the world."
"And every day we shall have less. And then none."
"Would you rather, therefore, have had nothing at all?"
"No. This is where I have always been coming to. Since my time began. And when I go away from here, this will be the mid-point, to which everything ran, before, and from which everything will run. But now, my love, we are here, we are now, and those other times are running elsewhere."
--- A.S. Byatt, Possession
A friend of mine,we've been talking lately about her relationship.It's funny,the way she sees it.The way she keeps telling me that the relationship is not going to last,that this boyfriend will not be her last,that they will never get married,stuff like that.Stuff,that an ordinary "In-a-relationship" person wouldnt normally say.I mean,you are in it now,right?So why think about the end of this journey when you only just started?She said she's being realistic,and that being so she wouldnt have any expectations,then in turn not have any disappointments,always happy.True,but i guess there is a thin line between being realistic and being disgustingly pessimistic,and here's the example,perfect one at that.
Having a relationship is not a trip around the globe,i think.You dont start on a journey thinking about the end of the line,especially when your sails are high and the wind is soothing,smooth sailing through the Pacific.It doesnt work that way,i guess.
Here's a part of A.S. Byatt's book,Possession that i found relevant to her situation.So here it is,enjoy.
"What is it? My dear?"
"Ah, how can we bear it?"
"Bear what?"
"This. For so short a time. How can we sleep this time away?"
"We can be quiet together, and pretend --- since it is only the beginning --- that we have all the time in the world."
"And every day we shall have less. And then none."
"Would you rather, therefore, have had nothing at all?"
"No. This is where I have always been coming to. Since my time began. And when I go away from here, this will be the mid-point, to which everything ran, before, and from which everything will run. But now, my love, we are here, we are now, and those other times are running elsewhere."
--- A.S. Byatt, Possession
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