In Continuum.

Ginger Dumb Men

Just imagine up above in the clouds,somewhere between the stratosphere and the infinite vacuum,a place few humans visited before,save for astronauts in or(unfortunately,at times)out of their spaceships,a place with angels flying around with worker hats and gloves,making humans and fixing DNA structures through an assembly line.At one end of this big machine,a bunch of angels worked on newly moulded humans,and as the DNA structures get pieced together,they go through the main part of this machine,that sort of puts everything together like a blender.Out comes these newly made humans,ready to be born into this world like Barbie dolls or Barney the Dinosaur soft toys.

Of course,in a situation whereby there is a large amount of production,in anything,there will of course be defacts.Products that arent exactly up to standard,so to speak.Let's just compare them with a bunch of overbaked ginger bread man.But instead of having melted mouth or a broken arm,you have brain the size of peas or IQ level beneath sea level,with the sky being the normal human standard.

There are a lot of such people lurking around our lives these days.Im not sure if it is just me,but while Ahmad attracts people to ask him for directions(strangely enough),i seem to attract the dumbest or the most idiotic life-forms in this world.I have an issue with stupidity,and i guess in a way i am allergic to it.There is a hidden volcano,a raging inferno building up like a compressed spring,ready to ignite or explode once it crosses the threshold.I dont sneeze,but roll my eyes in disgust as these defective products cross my path.It pains me,to converse,to interact,to even be in the vicinity of these people.I know,it might sound mean to say such things,but let me tell you the rationale behind my evil sayings.

It was book out night,and for some reason instead of a nicely cooked dinner from my mother,i wanted to get a Mac instead.It's the craving for chicken wings i reckon,fried ones of course.She parked the car by the side of the road and flicked on the temporary parking lights,while i leaped off the car with the fifty dollar note between my fingers.

The McDonalds was packed,and by the time it was my turn to take order it already took a little more than five minutes.It was a guy behind the counter,probably in his twenties.I figured,due to previous experiences,older employees at fast food joints are usually the ones who are more prone to mistakes.A burger without the piece of meat,or fries that arent actually fried at all,mistakes like these.Anyway,so i got into the queue with this younger dude,and from his accent he sounded like he was either from the Philipines or perhaps Indonesia.He spoke with a strong accent,though not the likes of a Malay accent.It was more exotic i guess,and from the way he mistook my order twice,i knew he was probably foreign.

McWings took a little while to actually get onto the tray.He took the order from the guy behind first,while i stood by the counter and waited.I shook my head with utter disgust,at the way he actually prepared the stuff for that poor dude behind me.Three packs of fries were all he asked for,and the three packs were tumbling all over one another in the plastic bag.The drinks he ordered,was actually horizonally placed in the bag,which meant that by the time that poor customer reaches home,half the coke wouldve been gone from the cup.

I waited,and i waited somemore.I left my iPod in the car,and the Gallery in my handphone was boring me out.Still,that maybe-Filipino-Indonesian guy was taking his time asking for the McWings from the back.Finally a box of it came sliding down,and he grabbed it.I thought to myself,"Finally!" as i prepared the money.But to my astonishment he opened the box and kept looking into it,as if the wings werent well cooked and he was using his laser eyes to make them hot again.

He came to me with the box opened,and then with that smile on his face he asked,"These are McWings,right?"

I had the urge to tell him,"No,those are quarter pounder burgers with coleslaw".Because seriously,there arent a lot of options in McDonalds,not a lot of food you could choose from really.Yet,you couldnt even remember what's actually sold.Hell,at least know what a chicken wing look like,right.Im sure they have those in Indonesia/Philippines,right?

Second incident happened to me today,as i desperately tried to rush back to camp on time.I was turned out,and by 1130am i was already downstairs with my bag,all dressed up and cursing under my breath the luck that i was 'enjoying'.I think it is rather safe to say that my house is probably the worst place to call for a taxi,if you are unwilling to actually pay for booking.Seriously,every single bloody taxi just go pass you without stopping,sometimes even without any passengers.Fifty metres away you see the light at the top flashing "Taxi".As it closes in to twenty metres he suddenly changes it to "Hired",and flies pass you with lightning speed,hoping you wouldnt notice his car place number to complain about him,and in turn get him fired from the job.

I was being turned out,crunch time.I needed to get back asap,and with the clock ticking towards 1230 i was panicking,and sweating under the blazing hot sun.I decided to give Comfort taxi a call,but for some strange reason all the lines were engaged.Lunchtime,i thought to myself.They must be having lunch right now,fuck.I tried about a trillion times,and all the phones were engaged.I decided to try my hands on Silvercab instead,but i forgot their number.Called Singtel Service line at 100,and they too were engaged due to lunch.GREAT,now i was running late for turn out under the blazing hot late May afternoon sun.Brilliant,just so fucking brilliant.

A sudden change of luck,or so it seemed,a cab pulled up at the side of me as i waved desperatly with my left hand,while the right was holding the handphone still trying to get through to the bloody lines.He rolled down his window,and leaned over the passenger seat and shouted over the noise of the traffic beside us.

"Where are you going?"
"Keat Hong Camp,Old Choa Chu Kang Road?"
"Oh,sorry.No time."
"But i am being activated.I am in NS,i am being called back."
"Sorry,no time."

With that,he rolled up his window,stepped on the gas and sped off into the blinding traffic.NO TIME?JUST WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?I am using my foreign life,putting it in the front lines of your bloody country,defending this piece of land which doesnt rightfully belong to me,and you are telling me that you havent got the TIME to fetch me back to camp?I almost threw my shoes at the bloody cab and hopefully smash the windscreen.I was that pissed,as i cursed aloud over the sound of the oncoming traffic.I was frustrated,and the heat of the afternoon didnt help at all.

So there,my experiences with idiots in just two days.Thank God i met up with my old friends from Maris Stella today,a bunch of brainiacs and intellectuals.It reminds me that there are still people in this country,in this world who are actually sensible enough.Because seriously,if those angels up there are going to continue with their work like that,coming up with bad quality products,i am seriously going to erupt like a bloody volcano and make sure the ashes will bury those idiots from Comfort Cab and McDonalds like the residence of Pompeii.