In Continuum.

Same Time Last Year

The tradition of Chinese New Year has evolved over the years,from the attack of that "Nian" beast a long long time ago,in some forgotten pronvince of China,to a season of family reunions and gatherings,to a holiday of relaxations,then ultimately to what it is now:Money.Let's admit it,Chinese New Year no longer has that "Oh,i love my family" feeling,not really strong,anyway.

Every year i get to spend Chinese New Year,happily.Alone.Unlike Valentine's Day i prefer to spend this one alone,because i simply hate the standard questions my relatives threw/will throw at me whenever i see them.The "Hey,grown taller?" or "How's NS?" or "Hey,handsome." type of bullshit.Im just glad that i get to spend it at home,in the comfort of my room,perhaps reading a good book or jamming on my newly fixed guitar while the rest of my social circle visits their relatives,predominantly with dread.My own relatives are across the South China Sea in homeland Taiwan,and the packets still come in despite being that far away.

God bless airplanes.

Ive gotten down to some new year resolutions.Or rather,things i aim to do this year.Something ive learnt from the past new year resolutions is the fact that they were made for the sake of making them.It's like those registry forms you have to fill up when you take some driving tests,or register for an email address.You know,the standard questions you got to fill up.Under the "Chinese New Year" registry there is a "Resolutions" category,supposedly mandatory.

But nobody ever follows them close.You might say,"I want to exercise and shed some weight",and six months into the new year you are still as fat as before.Or you want to save up some cash just to get that cool bike after you ORD,half a year into it and you are still as broke as you were six months before.Doesnt it piss you off that your will is not as strong as you wish it to be?

So,ive came up with a few resolutions myself,reasonable ones i deemed,easy to follow through.

1)Tastes as many as possible,all the Tiramisu in Singapore.
2)Learn more songs on my six string.
3)Survive NS till the end of this year.
4)Read more books,and more books,and then even more of those.

Easily attainable,realistic,requires minimal deterination and involves a whole lot of interest.Of course,with the exception of point number three,but it's not like i can do anything about that,right?

Anyway,so there i was on Orchard yesterday walking down the sidewalk.I love that feeling,with the music plugged in and pacing myself to the beat of the songs.It's sort of like catwalk,in a way.I dont know,the feeling is great.

Before i elaborate on anything else,it is funny how people do not recognise signs of ignorance.For example,in our daily lives.When somebody is curled up in a corner,staring into deep space for an hour or two,you know better not to disturb that person,right?Now,for me,my sign of ignorance is when my earpieces are in my ear and i am walking down the sidewalk with a stern face.It means,literally,"Go away,i dont want to talk to you,just let me through".People dont get that,and a short distance from Takashimaya to Wheelock's place i encountered about three school children asking for donations.I know you guys are doing for the greater good,but seriously,i wasnt in the charitable state of mind.

Anyhow,you ever had the feeling when you are looking back at yourself through the mirror?Or rather,imagine yourself staring through a special mirror,a mirror that time travels.You are then,looking at yourself from a year,maybe two,or even a decade from where you are now.Do you feel stupid looking at yourself?I do,when i look back at myself same time last year.It's funny how a single year can do to you,how much you mature.I was just minding my own business when i came across a bunch of youngsters,clearing straight out of school and hadnt tasted the reality of life yet.They still smelled like KLIM,and i just hated the sight of them.Posers,you might call them.Then i start to wonder if i was like that when i was their age,when reality never seemed too close to touch or realise.Oh well,sadly to my enlightenment,yes.I guess i probably was like that at their age.

Funny thing is how when you are fifty,and looking back at yourself at maybe...forty.The change wouldnt be that great,in terms of mental age and maturity.But when you are my age,nineteen and going on twenty,things become very complicated,because of the way things speed pass you like streetlamps outside of your car,the fleeting world.A single year,or even months can make a whole lot of difference.If i existed in 2001,i wouldve murdered myself with a baton.But then again,wouldnt that be like the Grandpa-effect?I would seize to exist afterwards.

I wonder if half of the people carrying guitars on the streets actually KNOWS how to play them.Perhaps they were like me,learning a single song and try to conquer the world with it.I remember that beach boy Barney,Ahmad and I saw at the guitar shop in Bras Basah.We were there on a guitar hunt,and we stumbled upon this guy in the store,strumming to a simple chord song,singing to his girlfriend,who was at that time staring at him with utmost admiration.He was the typical poser type,we all figured.Imagine,spiked hair,tanned skin,3/4 shorts and a t-shirt with some supposedly threatening phrases printed across.We couldnt take it anymore,so the three of us each took a guitar off the shelves and started playing "No Such Thing" by John Mayer.Halfway into the song and chorus,that guy left the store.

Triumph.

I guess a year from now that guy is going to feel very stupid of himself.Of course,i do not doubt,that a year from now i am going to feel very stupid of myself,too.The truth is,people are ever changing,always evolving into something better,hopefully anyway.A year from now i am probably going to think that whatever i did to that poor beach boy was mean,and that perhaps i shouldnt have done whatever i did.

But oh well,for now i am going to convince myself this one thing.

Stupidity is temporary,glory is forever.

Peace out.Happy Chinese New Year.And no,my house is not opened for visiting.